Friday, April 29, 2005

WTF Happened to My People?

Okay, I know I don't normally do the rant thing here. I leave that domain to Kat - who is exceptional at the articulate mud-slinging (and I would link you there if I only knew how!). But I just had to say - What the Fuck happened to People magazine?

The first weekend in May is about the "50 Most Beautiful People". This is the release of the annual collection of celebrity photos that is the best newsrag eye-candy outside of Vanity Fair's Hollywood issue. For years I have gobbled up this trifle to glimpse the wonderful studio shots of hotness that made headlines in the past year (cause the issue is really about who is kinda buzzing at the moment rather than beautifying) and read up on the random dancer/poet/ecologist selections that also made the list. It is a ritual. And it was a very satisfying one until today.

In all bluntness, the 2005 issue SUCKS! There is no portfolio of smiling faces, brooding hunkiness nor sepia-toned grandness. Instead, there is a mish-mash of themed collections that are more inane then the section divisions of the Sports Illustrated Swimsuit Issue. "Transformations" ... "World Beauties" ... "Games with Hot Guys" - the biggest offense as it attempts to put a fun spin on the manly pics but instead steals valuable photo space for useless googlized nonsense! In fact, it's hard to tell if 50 people are even represented at all!

I say, go back to the layout of the 1990s. Forget this tabloid-style, wire-image, faux-article bullshit and just give me 50 immaculate photos of 50 beautiful people. That's what it's supposed to be about afterall!

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