Sex, Chocolate & Endings

I have to confess that the last two days have not been my best. Having completed my final semester of an undergraduate degree, one would think that free-spirited elation would be coursing through my veins and propelling me into irrational happy dances at every turn. SO, not the case.

Two days out of school and I am bored. I have already visited every retail therapy outlet in the city. I have enjoyed my relaxing cup of chai at the bookstore by the fire. I have slept, and slept, and slept. I have used up all my weekly guilty pleasure vouchers in 48 hours. The result was the Blockbuster check-out girl saying, "Haagen Dasz and Sex in the City - sounds like a fun night."

Well, not when you put it so bluntly to the bored me at 11 pm on a FRIDAY night. See, a "fun" night would be having sex and then eating chocolate ice cream. It is not, substituting the man with frozen-coco-on-a-spoon and watching fictional women have relationships. But, there I was... the sad, lonely, desperate women who seeks comfort in a melting pint and sitcom friends as if I'd just broken up with someone.

Normally, this kind of night would be a joy. It would be the self-serving break in the midst of monotonous readings, challenging case analysis and frustrating group meetings. But all those things have ended. The typical release of such an evening didn't arrive. I was consoling the end of a relationship alright - the end of my relationship with university. It's daily stimulation is over. My crush-sighting opportunities are over. My random coffee conversations are over. My computer lab craziness in the wee hours is over. The faces and places that have made my days for the last three years are over. And as excited as I am about what is to come, tonight just felt empty.