Sudbury ... the Detox Centre for Film Addicts

Fridays are my free days. Thanks to the "student weekend", I have no classes and usually spend the day reading magazines at Chapters, trying on shoes at the Shoe Company, indulging in retail therapy at Winners and taking in a matinee (or early show now that universal pricing has arrived and the before-6pm incentive is gone). But what to do when the multiplex in town is a wasteland of film choices? Okay, yes, it is the off-season for movie releases, I'm aware of that fact. However, there are 12 rooms in the local SC so something should be availabe each week. But a review of today's choices prove otherwise (in spite of the large number - 5! - of openings):

Are We There Yet? - who cares! The real question should be why has this film made $75M?

Be Cool - you know, this may have to be my "methadone" choice, but only because I can be Elmore Leonard's bitch. But I'm thinking this is going to be more Big Bounce and less Out of Sight and therefore, nowhere near Get Shorty territory. I mean, Christina Milian = WTF?

Constantine - it is calling to me. Although it's not exceptional, I can't seem to get it out of my head. Will be checking it out again at the budget theatre for sure once it gets there!

Cursed - cause we really need an American version of Ginger Snaps and cause that 'Dawson's Creek' writer needs drinking money to kill the pain that is his current career.

Daniel & the Superdogs - enough said.

Hitch - playing in TWO theatres this film has proven (at $120M and counting) that people like Will Smith SO much that they will pay to hang out with him, as himself.

The Jacket - where the deadly angles of Adrien Brody's nose and Keira Knightley's jaw fight for screen time in a convoluted, time warp thriller - gee, that's got "must-see" all over it now, doesn't it?

Man of the House - why? because apparently we need more Christina Milian this weekend.

Meet the Fockers - yes, some films never die and linger on the vines that are mid-level city theatres until every last bit of juice can be dried out of them. It's sad really.

The Pacifier - because the new generation needs a Kindergarten Cop and Vin Diesel thought it would be fun to be in a movie with Faith Ford (WTF?) and a duck.

Pooh's Heffalump Movie - why is Disney doing this to us?

Son of the Mask - where interesting performers (Jaime Kennedy and Alan Cumming) make rent money.

See the dilemma here? At a time when Hotel Rwanda, Being Julia, Assassination of Richard Nixon, Vera Drake and Kinsey are in theatres, I get the above choices for Friday veiwing. Time to just huddle in a corner and shake away the craving I guess. Wish me luck.