Have a Little Heart

When I was in grades 1 & 2 we would build heart-shaped envelopes out of red construction paper and post them in the hallway outside the classroom door. Each of us would decorate our heart and what for that time on the morning of Valentine's Day when we distribute, collect and count our classmates' valentines. My mom would take us to the store to buy the book with the perforated images to punch out and sign. The challenge was to find the right valentine for each person. The one with the best picture, most accurate saying, cutest comment. Since those moments I have always been a sucker for the cheesy value of retro-budget valentines cards. Over the years I have sent valentines of various kinds to my friends far and near. For me, valentine's day has never been a romantic event. I have never had a real relationship on this day of hearts and so, I have never moved beyond my feelings of V-day as nothing more than a cute and nostalgic experience from childhood. The roses, jewelery, and chocolates are lost on me. I know that someday my own special Ralph will "choo-choo-choose me". Until then? Happy Heart Day to you all.

Italian Distraction

Oh CBC, you know I love you but your relentless coverage of the Torino Olympics is like quicksand! Two days into the big event and I'm easily shoving my "homework" and "research" aside in order to watch Jennifer Heil win Gold in women's moguls and Cindy Klassen take Bronze in speed skating. But I gotta say that the womens' hockey is boring. We are kicking ass SO HUGE (16-0 over Italy, and 12-0 over Russia!!) that it's almost sad. With two weeks left I wonder if I will ever get anything done!?
Key events on my schedule include:
13th - pairs figure skating
14th - mens figure skating (happy valentine's day to me!)
15th - mens freestyle skiing moguls
16th - mens figure skating - medals!!
19th - ice dance figure skating
20th - womens hockey GOLD medal game
21th - mens hockey CDN vs. CZE - brunch game!
22th - mens PGS snowboarding
23th - womens figure skating & mens aerials
26th - mens hockey GOLD medal game (can I assume this?) at 8AM!!!
GO CANADA GO!!!

Clear as Will Be

There has been a recent shift in my thinking these days. After weathering a month of hurt, hope and heartache I figured it was time to finally do some healing. Not just healing of the immediate things, but an overall reflection and reconstruction of myself. My theme for this process is "clarity".

Once before this word had resonance for me ... my yearbook quote the year I graduated from highschool stated that "you must strive to see clearly around you" from Dumas' The Count of Monte Cristo. But this time, the clarity is different. Whereas Dumas' hero must be wary of the enemies around him, I must be wary of my enemy within. My new search is about striving to see ME clearly. It's an exciting and empowering time echoed in a weekly paper's horoscope last week that began with a quote from one of my favourite authors (OH! the convergence!)...

"We are what we pretend to be," wrote author Kurt Vonnegut, "so we must be careful about what we pretend to be." This is excellent advice to keep at the forefront of your awareness during the coming weeks, Pisces. ... There's not necessarily anything wrong with playing a role if that role is in alignment with your highest values. In fact, to make believe that you are the person you want to be is an excellent strategy for actually becoming the person you want to be.

Kiss This!

This is me kissing a fish.
On January 27, the MBA program hosted its annual International Potluck.
This year, the gang from Newfounland offered up a quickie "Screeching In" ceremony for us non-Atlantic folk.
So, althought the fish ain't a cod and I wasn't ON the island, the screech and the newf (shout out to Rob!) were real!
And it may not have been a frog prince ... but a girl does what she can!

Gotta Get on Grey

There is a reason that the only CAN'T miss show for me is "Grey's Anatomy" and it was in solid effect with this past Sunday's episode. This show just keeps getting better. Although I'm still not a fan of the titular Meredith Grey (she has a fish-mouth smile), the remainder of the cast is one of the most-inspired since the original "er". It's also likely that Grey's will take over the "er" position as the best medical soap on TV - its SOOOO good. Yes, I'm not telling you anything about it cause you have to watch and discover for yourself. True, there are no surgeons with the humanity of Burke in real life. True, you can love the character of Bailey but wouldn't want to actually work for one. True, there is NO chemistry between Sheppard and Addison and that whole charade just needs to stop now. But when a show has a cliff-hanger of the central character with her arm stuck in a patient's body cavity with her hand around a potentially live-round of ammunition? You pay attention.

Souptacular

This past week I made Butternut Squash Soup for the first time. I have never really made a soup from scratch before so this was a bit of an experiment. I think it turned out lovely. I actually sauteed a ton of orange & red peppers and added them to the mix so the soup had a solid peppers undertone. And I LOVE the flavour of squash thanks to my time in Australia (where its called pumpkin). And I finished it off with dill - my spice of choice - and a dash of parmesan cheese - for some kick. Overall, I was very chuffed with my first attempt. However, I did not make enough soup to share so the opinions of my concoction are really limited to myself and, considering my love of "bland" food, may not be the most informed. Greg did manage to snag a bowl but his comments have not yet been voiced to verify merit in my soup styling. But it was a start - I can only get better from here!

Pubbing

February kicks into gear with a rain-soaked "walking tour" of Halifax watering holes. There is something so fun about being out with your friends and classmates in matching shirts. Gotta love the MC logo usage for this tour's theme. My favourite line of the night ... "How do you swipe those" ... delivered by a 60-year-old English man whilst staring at my chest. Less dramatic (for some) than the October event but still top notch. Cheers!!

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Maybe the Single Girls Understand

There are moments when no matter how swimmingly your life appears to be going you can feel a crashing thud in your social sphere. There are moments when all that effort to believe you are an amazing, intelligent, attractive, funny, sexy, understanding, caring women with something to offer is shattered. Often these moments are created in the minds of ourselves - we can be our own worst enemies. But there are other moments that you cannot control that rock you to the core. Make you feel small. Make you feel powerless and weak and sad for thinking that you could be more. These are the broken heart moments of the "modern, independent" woman.

In less than 10 days, the "in-your-face" celebration of Valentine's Day will arrive. This is the day that many will OPEN their hearts to others. They will embrace love, affection and joy. They will use sappy, commercial constructions to convey emotions they are too overwhelmed with to say themselves. For me? I see my heart close ever tighter as this day approaches. Attempts at vulnerability have been, quite soundly, rejected, and I can feel my heart begin to retreat again. I hate the notion of being closed off but it happens nonetheless. I can only take so much. I deserve more. I only wish it didn't hurt so much to get there.