Dealing with Me

I often think that I am a pain in the ass and a little bit crazy. These days, as my school anxiety is hitting the roof, I have to take some time to reflect on my personality and mitigate the trouble spots.

I have my "personality" profile information that I sometimes use to diffuse my angst. I am a solid INTJ - and while I haven't completely figured out how to leverage my skills they are there.

Then this time around I found an interesting website that had a list of things to keep in mind when dealing with someone like ME - and they rang true. So as I am about to go off the deep-end it is probably helpful for my friends and coworkers to keep these in mind...

Be willing to back up your statements with facts - or at least some pretty sound reasoning.

Try not to be repetitive. It annoys them.

Do not feed them a line of bull.

Expect debate. INTJs like to tear ideas apart and prove their worthiness. They will even argue a point they don't actually support for the sake of argument.

Do not mistake the strength of your conviction with the strength of your argument. INTJs do not need to believe in a position to argue it or argue it well. Therefore, it will take more than fervor to sway them.

Do not be surprised at sarcasm.

Remember that INTJs believe in workable solutions. They are extremely open-minded to possibilities, but they will quickly discard any idea that is unfeasible. INTJ open-mindedness means that they are willing to have a go at an idea by trying to pull it apart. This horrifies people who expect oohs and ahhs and reverence. The ultimate INTJ insult to an idea is to ignore it, because that means it's not even interesting enough to deconstruct.

Do not expect INTJs to actually care about how you view them. They already know that they are arrogant bastards with a morbid sense of humor. Telling them the obvious accomplishes nothing.

Rosebuds

If I had to declare a preferred subject for my photography these days it would be rosebuds. I love the dried, shrivelled and expressive bods twisting on spikey stems. There is a hedge of rose bushes by a local school that has become a favourite place of mine. Recent treasures:

... ...

... ...

... ...

2 Weeks and Counting ...

As usual I find myself being reflective in the weeks leading up to my birthday. Two weeks till I turn 33. As I look back through this blog I realize that it has (unplanned) become a chronicle of my 30s thus far. I began my online ramblings a few weeks before my 30th birthday and have attempted to keep up-to-date since then. So now I am about to celebrate my 33rd year of life and I am not quite sure what to make of it all.

I came to Halifax with a particular plan in mind and that plan lays in tatters behind me on paths I did not take and on detours I found. I am four weeks away from confirming my graduation status with a thesis still to write, two courses worth of deliverables to complete and a job to satisfy. I don't feel secure that I can do it and yet I see no other choice - what a corner I have painted for myself. If I look back to my young adulthood and the impressions I had about what my life would be at 33 I find no similarities. I have no relationship. I have not started a family. I don't own a home. I have not begun my career.

This view sounds depressing doesn't it? But I am not depressed. My life feels more connected and secure than it has in ages - in spite of the change and ambiguity on the horizon. I am happier now than I have been in the last couple of years. I have taken some hard knocks and I am getting over most of that now. Some days I catch myself just smiling for no reason. And while there are still many things I would like to do that I cannot figure out how to achieve there is a frisson of potential in the air that I had forgotten. I must remind myself to carry this energy into my birthday wishes to bless the opportunities that can arise in year 34.

Oscar Night in 2008

I was not sure if I would be into the Oscars this year. I had not seen many of the films and with the writer's strike the entire affair has been under a cloud of doom since the fall. But I put on my PJs and sat down with my Dr. Pepper and Pringles anyway to see what was what.

And I must confess to really enjoying the telecast this year. I think the last minute writing kept things simple rather than bloated. I think the 80th anniversary tributes added star-power and sincerity rather than time spent on lame gags. I think removing the intros (and clips) of the nominated films was good choice. (I think removing the performances of original songs would be a good one too!) I think that the party felt much more like the Golden Globes. There was a lightness in the air at the Kodak Theatre last night. The sense of relief of having the "show go on" was palpable and it made everyone relax and enjoy the moment. And in the end it was enjoyable for all. Random observations below:

Why is Miley Cyrus at the Oscars?

Jon Stewart's opening monologue makes me laugh more than any host since Billy Crystal's original stint. Of course I don't understand why ANY monologue is necessary but at least Jon is entertaining.

Cate Blanchett has the most radiant smile. I dare anyone to not want to be in its path. But her billowing purple bump dress isn't a bit mainstream for me. I was hoping for something edgier from her.

Twenty minutes into the show and I teared up! Damn tributes and that Titanic song! I'm such a softie for people honestly being touched by recognition.

Pirates doesn't win for make-up instead the honour goes to La Vie en Rose thereby signaling that the ability to make a hot woman (Marion Cotillard) unattractive and older (as Edith Piaf) is considered quite the feat!

The Golden Compass wins for visual effects and all I can think is that Jeff is going to pissed off! It feels wrong when compared to the effects in Pirates of the Carribean. Interesting that the film's first cut was considered SO lacklustre that Disney ordered up more cash to redo the effects. I guess you could say the investment paid off.

It still freaks me out to see Harrison Ford and Calista Flockhart together - even though it has been 7 years! But it gives me hope that maybe life can spin on an unexpected dime and you get Indiana Jones as your man.

Javier Bardem takes the supporting actor prize - the first acting non-surprize of the night. It reminded me of Bencio Del Toro's wind with a bit of Jamie Foxx thrown in with his Spanish thanks to mama. Man, I love grown men taking their moms to the big show!

Loved all the English-as-second-language moments for the winners (the guy for live action short, the Italian costume designers, Marion Cotillard). All so heart-warming.

Tilda Swinton takes supporting actress as if to follow the last year's Arkin upset. A well-deserved award but sadly she wore a velvet trashbag to the event. But then ALL is redeemed as she totally takes the piss out of George Clooney by commenting on his "commitment to his art" by wearing his batsuit ("the one with the nipples") under his clothes.

God I LOVE James McAvoy's accent. And his pep. And his dry humour. And his eyes!

Jonah Hill & Seth Rogen appear looking identical. It is both hilarious and creepy. And the future of suburban cineplex fare.

An early presentation for Best Actress yields another surprise. Hmmmm ... Marion Cotillard wins and the Blanchett's look of surprised glee almost overshadows the French actress' beauty. "You rocked my life" ... "Thank you life. Thank you love"

Colin Farrell returns! Yeah! I have been mssing those chocolate eyes. And he talks about Once which Keir recommended so I guess I have to see it now.

The tribute to the last 79 Best Picture winners really showed how movies have changed over time.

Patrick Dempsey is introduced as "versatile and handsome" - good thing the writers came back!

Jon Stewart brings the second original song winner back out on stage post commercial to give her chance to actually say thankyou. A wonderful gesture and the work of a true master of ceremonies. The winner then goes on to deliver a fantastic speech about Hope and the arts making the action worthwhile for us all.

Cameron Diaz rocks the best nude lips in history. How did she get that shine?

Where is Keira Knightley???

Diablo Cody wins original screenplay for Juno. She must be the first Oscar winner who was previously an exotic dancer and has a bikini-clad woman tattooed on her arm. A breath of tiger-print fresh air to the night.

Daniel Day Lewis wins Best Actor. The man has serious action chops. But I really dislke him. Can't watch him. He drives me nuts. And the earrings? Dude - WTF?

No Cecile B. DeMille award. Guess there wasn't an old guy in Hollywood that needed to be honoured in 2008. Hmmmmm...

Best Picture goes to No Country for Old Men

No big sweeps. Lots of interesting supporting awards and a sense of fun that has been lacking. The End.

2005 ... 2006 ... 2007

Red Carpet Rundown

OK .. new thing for this year because I sat and watched the red carpet pre-show (the one with Regis NOT the one with creeeepy Ben!) and made a bunch of comments on the fashion. As the first major red carpet for Hollywood this year it was a bit of big deal and I wanted to see who was doing what with their fashion time.

I found a few favourites and was horrified by a few others. But it appears that my taste is not like that others. Many of the outfits I disliked the most ended up on Best Dressed Lists and many I loved were criticized. It just reminds me that fashion is a personal thing and by better be okay with because people are watching! hahaha

Jessica Alba wore a fabulous wine-colour that is perfect for her newly bumped bod but suffered by having an ostrich wing sewn to her chest. WTF?

Oh Jennifer Hudson. Someone had to remind her that racer-style halter necklines are not made for bigger girls. (just ask Triny & Susannah)

Marion Cotillard looked like a scallopped goddess in Jean Paul Gaultier.

Javier Badem did the tux & scruff thing and made me sit up and go Mmmmmm.... Seriously, smile lines will get me every time.

Helen Mirren looked incredible in red with crystal sleeves. Every woman needs to take grand dame notes from her.

Katherine Heigl continued her assault on Hollywood rocking her usual Escada. But, man, I hate her. Hate the short hair. She needes to get off my TV.

Jennifer Garner has boob problems AGAIN! Remember the baby blue squishiness of her first appearance? I am sensing that star stylist Rachel Zoe isn't so good with the bust line measurements of her clients.

Daniel Day Lewis' wife showed up looking like a British medal of honour.

Heidi Klum kicked some serious red carpet ass in a red confection of elegance.

Cameron Diaz is back in structured pink (one step up form her origami white from last year) but it's BORING. And a dress that hugs her ASS is not the best choice since it made a tall, lithe woman look lumpy and padded.

Amy Adams has the sweetest little ski jump nose. No wonder she played a live-action version of a Disney princess.

Steve Carell can totally rock a tuxedo. There is an old Hollywood look about it that reminds me of the man behind the comedian and he's very attractive.

I could not figure out what Penelope Cruz was going for. She managed to tackle almost every trend of the evening in one dress. But anything that makes one walk around with a cascade of feathers on the ass needs to be re-evaluated.

Keri Russell is SO pretty.

Ellen Page - she's so clever - but putting her in spaghetti straps was maybe not the best choice.

Hilary Swank brought a great dress this year. Not too poofy. Not too different. Just Versace goodness.

Renee Zellweger shows up in a liquid diamonds dress with a thigh-high slit. I can't imagine how heavy it was but it flowed beautifully - like a ray of sun dancing on snow. Gorgeous and back to her best-dressed status in spite of the hair.

Nicole Kidman - GASP! - Necklaces galore in dripping chains of diamond crystals. Impeccable. Decadent. Wonderful. Just WOW! All down the front and All down the back. A fashion statement for another newly bumped star to firmly keep the attention on her face and luminous skin.

Feathers, one-shoulders and excessive folding - there was something about dress design this year that was just a bit annoying and hopefully not a sign for what lies ahead.

Barely Sports

You know what I love? Each year that the Sports Illustrated swimsuit edition is published the women wear less and less swimsuit. Apparantly, the ideal swimming attire for 2008 is a giant necklace. I'll get right on that!

SI Cover 2008

The Gift of Choice

I am not posting this graphic to be controversial but it may inevitably be so. What comes to mind most about this image is that there is a growing generation of young women who will NOT understand its meaning. They have not grown up in a world where the choice for abortion was NOT a reality. They have not grown up with pregnancy termination being illegal. They have grown up with an assumed cushion that many can't even acknowledge.

It does not matter whether or not one agrees with abortion. It does not matter if one would make that choice. What matters is that the option exists, freely, to be exercised. And this option creates a world of sexual freedom, physical control and personal choice that women did not always possess. What a world that would be.

The choice to terminate pregnancy is now available to Canadian women in almost all provinces (PEI excepted) through provincial health care in hospitals or hospital-based clinics. And many major cities in Canada also have private abortion clinics that charge for the practise. These facilities are the direct result of the efforts of Dr. Henry Morgantaler who established the first clinic in Canada and continued to perform "illegal" abortions until all remaining legal restrictions against abortion were abolished. (It is important to note that Morgentaler's delivery was not pristine. And the practise has improved beyond the black-market operations and medical impropriety for which he was charged in the 1970s.)

The legal status of abortion changed in 1988(!!) due to a case involving Dr. Henry Morgentaler. Prior to that date (for about 20 years), a safe, hospital-based abortion could only be granted if a hospital therapeutic committeed determined the pregnancy a danger to a woman's health. This process was deemed constutionally unfair in the Morgentaler case and the last hurdle to a woman's right to choose was removed.

This year marks the 20th anniversary of the important ruling. As such, a group of pro-choice groups in Canada mounted a campaign to have Henry Morgentaler invested into the Order of Canada. (It is the third such attempt to have the doctor honoured.) The Order of Canada is given to recognize a "...lifetime of outstanding achievement, dedication to the community and service to the nation. The Order recognizes people in all sectors of Canadian society. Their contributions are varied, yet they have all enriched the lives of others and made a difference to this country."

This week the Globe & Mail posted a poll asking if Morgentaler should be nominated. The results were overwhelmingly in the negative (85%). You can see the results here.

As of today, it appears that the advocacy for Morgentaler has fallen on deaf ears as his name was not amongst those to be recognized this year. It is time to really think about how we perceive people's achievements and what their actions truly do for our nation as a whole. As women move forward in their lives let them continue to live in a free space of personal life choices and the challenges that such a choice must surely bring to the individual. Let us not move backward into a world that regulates one gender because of a biological mechanism beyond its control. And let us recognize the contribution of the man who fought for the right to choose a safe choice.

Exposure

Sometimes I like to play with my random photo editor (that is NOT photoshop but whatever) and see what I can create. It makes me feel like an "artist" even though I am still an amateur. That being said, I do really like the images below that I blew the constrast on. So I thought I would share them.